Ambiamorous

Also: ambi

Comfortable in either monogamous or non-monogamous configurations — capable of fulfillment in both, choosing based on a specific relationship rather than a fixed orientation.

1 min read · Reviewed 2026-05-20

Ambiamorous describes a person who can find fulfillment in either a monogamous or a non-monogamous configuration, and whose choice between the two is driven by the specific relationship in front of them rather than by an intrinsic orientation toward one or the other. The word is constructed analogously to bisexual or ambidextrous: a both-and capacity, not a hybrid third position.

Ambiamorous people typically describe being able to take either shape seriously and find each compatible with their values, given the right partner and structure. This is different from someone who is polyamorous and currently in a monogamous-by-circumstance period; an ambiamorous person is not waiting to return to a default shape.

The term is relatively new, gaining traction in the mid-2010s as practitioners looked for language that named the shape-flexibility that orientations like 'polyamorous' or 'monogamous' did not capture. It is useful in dating contexts to communicate that a person is open to either configuration but has a preference depending on partner.

What ambiamorous is not: it is not a synonym for 'undecided' or 'figuring it out' (those imply temporariness; ambiamorous is a stable orientation toward flexibility). It is also not the same as monogamish or open-by-default; an ambiamorous person in a monogamous relationship is genuinely monogamous within it.

Where this term fits in the wider picture

Ethical non-monogamy is a network of overlapping practices, identities, and structures — and Ambiamorous connects to several of them. The neighbouring terms below show how this one sits alongside the rest of the vocabulary practitioners actually use; the guide at the end is the longer-form treatment of the same territory.

Closely-related vocabulary

Polyamory
The practice of, or willingness to engage in, multiple loving romantic relationships, with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved.
Open relationship
A committed primary relationship in which the partners have agreed that outside sexual, and sometimes romantic, connections are allowed within negotiated terms.
Monogamish
A largely-monogamous relationship that has agreed-on, often narrow, exceptions to strict exclusivity — typically rare, usually sexual, often situational.

Questions practitioners actually ask about this

Continue reading

The longer treatment of this territory is in the guide What is ethical non-monogamy? A clear primer for adults thinking it through — An honest, plain-language introduction to ethical non-monogamy — what it is, what it isn't, the configurations it covers, and the questions it asks of you.

New to ethical non-monogamy? Start with the glossary for vocabulary, the structures index for the named relationship configurations practitioners actually use, and the guides for longer-form treatment of the common questions.