Polyamory

Also: poly

The practice of, or willingness to engage in, multiple loving romantic relationships, with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved.

1 min read · Reviewed 2026-05-20

Polyamory describes a relationship orientation and a practice. The orientation: a person who is polyamorous is open to, or seeking, more than one loving romantic relationship at a time. The practice: a person who is practising polyamory currently has, or is forming, those multiple relationships. The word was coined in the early 1990s, joining the Greek poly (many) and the Latin amor (love) — a hybrid that linguistic purists object to and the practising community uses anyway.

Polyamory is one specific shape under the broader umbrella of ethical non-monogamy. What distinguishes polyamory from other non-monogamous configurations is its emphasis on romantic depth in each connection. An open relationship typically allows outside sexual connections while reserving romantic-partnership status for the central pair; polyamory makes no such reservation. Multiple deep romantic attachments are the point, not the exception.

There is no single correct way to do polyamory. The structure can be hierarchical, with an explicitly primary relationship and one or more secondary partners; non-hierarchical, with no ranked tiers; solo, with autonomy as the organising principle; or anchor-based, with deeply entwined relationships that nevertheless do not rank others as lesser. Polycules — the web of romantic connections across a group — can be small or large, dense or sparse, kitchen-table or parallel.

Common misconceptions: polyamory is not a synonym for swinging or for casual sexual non-exclusivity (those are typically open-relationship arrangements or named differently within their communities). Polyamory does not mean a person cannot make commitments; commitments are common, they are just plural. Polyamory does not mean an absence of jealousy; practitioners commonly describe learning to feel and work with jealousy rather than to never experience it.

Academic researchers who have followed polyamorous families longitudinally (notably Elisabeth Sheff's twenty-year study) report relationship stability, child wellbeing, and life satisfaction within ranges comparable to monogamous comparison groups. The structures look unusual; the outcomes do not look pathological.

Where this term fits in the wider picture

Ethical non-monogamy is a network of overlapping practices, identities, and structures — and Polyamory connects to several of them. The neighbouring terms below show how this one sits alongside the rest of the vocabulary practitioners actually use; the guide at the end is the longer-form treatment of the same territory.

Closely-related vocabulary

Ethical non-monogamy
An umbrella term for relationship structures in which everyone involved knows about, and consents to, the participants having more than one romantic or sexual connection.
Polycule
The web of romantic connections between a group of people — the network you would draw if you sketched everyone's relationships as nodes and edges.
Metamour
Your partner's other partner. Your partner-in-law, in a sense — a person you are connected to through a shared partner but are not themselves partnered with.
Compersion
The felt-sense of joy at a partner's joy with another partner — sometimes described as the emotional opposite of jealousy.
Open relationship
A committed primary relationship in which the partners have agreed that outside sexual, and sometimes romantic, connections are allowed within negotiated terms.
Solo polyamory
Polyamory practised without a primary or nesting partner, with autonomy and self-defined life as organising principles rather than partnership-as-default.

Questions practitioners actually ask about this

Continue reading

The longer treatment of this territory is in the guide What is ethical non-monogamy? A clear primer for adults thinking it through — An honest, plain-language introduction to ethical non-monogamy — what it is, what it isn't, the configurations it covers, and the questions it asks of you.

New to ethical non-monogamy? Start with the glossary for vocabulary, the structures index for the named relationship configurations practitioners actually use, and the guides for longer-form treatment of the common questions.